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Joke of the Day

"Why did the skunk buy four boxes of tissues? Because he had a stinking cold!"

"Can you run a bath when you have the runs? ... only if you have enough."

"What do you do, if you're jerking off when you're meant to do something else but you're putting it off? Procrasturbation."

"About to start a new job as a pizza delivery driver, any tips?"

"Apparently, you can only say ""Look at you! You got so big!"" to kids. Old girlfriends tend to get offended. Who knew?"

"I've never seen a chameleon. Good job, chameleons."

"As a woman it's annoying when men think they are better drivers When I'm trying to park I don't need you to offer help every 20 minutes"

"I got busted visiting Texas. For trying to smuggle in books. Luckily, I got off on a technicality. No one could prove they were books."

"What is Brown and rhymes with Snoop? Dr. Dre, of course."

"I hear it's snowing steadily in Istanbul... In fact, in Istanbul they can't stop the snowplow"