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Joke of the Day

"Put the punchline in the title. How do you ruin a good joke?"

"[Offensive] I like my wine the way I like my Women... Nine years old and in the cellar."

"This Halloween I will be dressing up as Malaysia Airlines Flight 370 by RSVPing to all possible parties & attending absolutely none of them."

"Being in a nudist colony probably takes all the fun out of Halloween."

"What do burnt pizza, frozen beer and a pregnant chick have in common? Some douchebag forgot to pull it out in time."

"Over the past year, my sexual fetishes have been slowly getting more perverse. But it wasn't until I spanked a statue that I realised I'd hit rock bottom."

"After they got married she even put his truck nuts in a jar."

"The opposite of aging gracefully is aging nancygracefully, where you literally morph into a horrible human being."

"Sigmund Freud was a moron with a huge ego And id. And superego."

"[being carried away by a colony of ants] haha nice let's see where this goes"