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Joke of the Day

"Funny, this warrant doesn't feel so outstanding."

"Why shouldn't you buy trousers from northern Ukraine? Chernobyl fall out."

"Did you hear about the one about the heart and stomach? Nevermind, it's an inside joke."

"What is Kylo Ren's favorite beverage? Supreme Liter Coke"

"You have to give it to pedophiles They're the only ones who follow the speed limit in school zones"

"So I went to a restaurant called Bukkake the other day... WAY too much sauce on everything."

"Why don't blind people go skydiving? It scares the crap out of their dogs!"

"MARRIAGE PROTIP - Guys, if you have a picture of your junk on your phone, you better be sure your wife has a copy of it on hers. Good talk."

"What do I love about living in Switzerland? The flag is a big plus."

"If I were a homeless guy, I'd walk up behind young women, put my arm around them & cop a feel on a boob because I have nothing to lose."