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Joke of the Day
"They should really have disposable razors in the women's bathrooms at bars."
Next Joke
"Harry is a? Fucking WIZARD!"
"[first day as coast guard] Boss: 7 people died on your watch today Me [looking off into the distance]: yes but the coast is fine"
"Sergeant Miller! Yes sir? I didn't see you at the camouflage training yesterday! Thank you sir!"
"If there's 'Extra Virgin' olive oil, there has to be a 'Dirty Slut' variety as well"
"A man walks into a bar, looks at the bartender and says...... please fill in a punch line"
"I'm a lover, not a fighter. So if anyone is giving you trouble and you need me to have sex with them, I'm your man."
"A 40 year old man goes to buy a car.... and all he can afford is a base model civic."
"Me: LARGE FRY! McDonald's Manager: Ma'am, you can't use the drive-thru riding a stick pony. Please leave NOW Me: I WILL CUT YOU! *sirens*"
"What's a mexicans favorite game? Cross country."