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Joke of the Day

"What's the opposite of Christopher Reeves? Christopher Walken. -not an original, just wanted to share."

"What the world needs is a self help movie, cause lets face it, most of us won't buy the book."

"Where do you find a turtle with no legs? right where you left it."

"What is a Canadians favorite board game? Sorry!"

"Two blondes were walking down the road and the first blonde said ""Look at that dog with one eye!"" The other blonde covers one of her eyes and goes ""Where?"""

"Which state has the most progressive bathroom laws? Transylvania."

"What did the hurricane say to the palm tree? Hang onto your nuts, because this is going to be one hell of a blow job."

"LEGOLAS: You have my bow. GIMLI: And my ax. [Everyone looks at me, closely guarding my sandwich] ME: You can have a SMALL bite."

"I started a band called 999 megabytes.... ...we have yet to secure a gig."

"COP: Nobody on the main floor. Let's check upsta-- GIRAFFE COP: Nobody upstairs"