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Joke of the Day
"when i was a kid i never trusted stairs. those bastards were always up to something."
Next Joke
"Why do ballet dancers always stand on their toes? Could they not hire taller dancers?"
"Cat doesn't realize if he succeeds in tripping me on the way downstairs to feed him, we all die."
"How to be happier: 1. Exercise 2. Lift weight 3. When you've become stronger due to those exercises, smack the person who made you unhappy."
"How can I know hundreds of digits of pi But not know the digits of your phone number?"
"What do you call a lizard that can't get a boner? A reptile dysfunction"
"I named my penis pony... ..because it's the smaller version of what you really wanted and you only get a ride if you're under 12."
"Why couldn't the FBI find Sepp Blatter's bribe money? He used it all to bribe Canada to host the Women's World Cup."
"Q: What is the best thing that ever came out of Arkansas? A: Highway 55."
"A British man asked to his friend, ""How many seats are there in the van?"" ""More than the Lib Dems."""