144477

Joke of the Day

"What is the difference between a kid and a fridge The fridge does not scream when I put my meat in it."

"Making a grocery list after 8 beers is awesome because the next morning I get to wonder why I need 7000 bags of pizza rolls."

"There are teenagers smoking pot in this parking lot I'm gonna throw an ax at them I bet you they get so paranoid"

"BREAKING NEWS Justin Bieber said... And I quote, ""Only God can Judge me!"" THIS JUST IN ...Apparently I'm God."

"My wife was excited after my vasectomy. She said it was a load off of her chest.^.(stole ^off ^imgur, ^sowwie)"

"Just once I'd like to see a celebrity show up to the red carpet in jeans and be like, ""Oh, was this today? I was just in the neighborhood."""

"There are over 4 million workplace injuries reported every year. Play it safe, call in sick tomorrow."

"My dad's the real winner of this election... He passed away last week."

"Feminists hate words with masculine-sounding roots... ...maybe that's why none of them have any manners."

"What do you call a Donald Trump protestor's favorite word game? Mad Libs."