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Joke of the Day

"Before murdering someone ask yourself: Am I justified? Will I find forgiveness? Did I pay for the shovel in cash?"

"Yo mama's so ugly, the day she died and met saiten, saiten made her leader of hell.."

"[Meta] I made a subreddit for anti pickup lines If you want to post an antipick up line, post it to /r/antipickuplines"

"Once you commit to the idea of a closed casket funeral it really takes a lot of pressure off how you live your life."

"I was at the gym last night and I noticed a hole in my trainer big enough to put my finger in... Now I'm banned from the gym"

"Laugh alone and the world thinks you're an idiot."

"What do women and KFC have in common? Once your done with breasts and the thighs, all you have left to do is stick your bone in a greasy box..."

"i love how flies rub their hands together like little criminals"

"How many tickles does it take to tickle an octopus? Ten- tickles FTW!"

"I just saw Iron Lady. Marvel really dropped the ball on that one..."