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Joke of the Day

"My mom asked me a question and when I went to answer she said, ""Hold on I can't hear you. I gotta turn on the light."" The dark was too loud?"

"What is grosser that gross? Ten naked men running around in a circle and the first one stops."

"Why are there never any cool side affects from drugs? Like ""this drug may cause severe sexiness"""

"A fairy godmother but for breakups. She takes your phone and leaves alcohol and possibly your first cat."

"at library ME: This book wasn't helpful at all! LIBRARIAN: Why? What's the problem? BIRD: [mockingly] ""Why? What's the problem?"""

"A man, a lawyer, a redneck, a nun, a blonde, a dog, and a priest walk into a bar. The bartender looks up and says, ""Is this some kind of a joke?"""

"I went to the library and asked if they had any books on Schrodinger's cat and Pavlov's dog. The librarian said that they may or may not have it, but that it rings a bell."

"What's an African's least favorite appetizer? E - Bola Soup"

"Two atoms walk into a party at the Large Hadron Collider... It was full of nerds so they split."

"NURSE: *bursts into break room* A man just came to the ER with a broken bone thru his skin! DR DOG: *looks at other Drs* I'll take this one"