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Joke of the Day

"What is the difference between an arrested public masturbator and a period? The period comes after the sentence."

"Why is it best to ship boxes using a UPS truck? The DOWNS truck is a little slow."

"What does snowman have and snow women doesn't, snowballs."

"What vegetable has the most sexual self-control? The cuecummer!"

"Have you got the address of the butter website? Yes but don't spread it around."

"You know what I did before I married? Anything I wanted to."

"If you throw a banjo and accordian off a tall building, which one hits the ground first... Who cares?"

"Why can't a blonde dial 911? She can't find the eleven"

"Donald Trump is losing support from Republicans He is considering joining the Whig party."

"I've eaten so many cheeseburgers, my hula hoop is just a fancy waist bracelet."