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Joke of the Day

"Why do you always see beggars at protests? They're always looking for some sort of change!"

"What does a bodybuilder do while waiting in a long line? Weights"

"Why should you never shout at a pirate? Because it hurts their buccaneers. (Sorry it's lame, I just made it up)"

"I'm on the fermented barley diet... and I've never felt better."

"They won't be able to serve bottled beer this year at the baseball stadium. They lost the opener."

"My son managed to lock the car with my keys still in the ignition. He suggest a coat hanger. I said we're a few years too late for that."

"Milliband, Clegg and Farage have quit. Proof that the Conservatives are forcing people out of work."

"Did you hear about the idiot who invented the one-piece jigsaw puzzle?"

"What did the tampon say to the other tampon? Nothing. They were both stuck up bitches."

"What do a black person and a bike have in common? they both don't work without a chain."