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Joke of the Day

"Hell: A place where all of the wine and liquor bottles have holes on the bottom... ...and the women don't."

"Q: How many programmers does it take to screw in a light bulb? A: None that's a hardware problem."

"Sandeep the indian wifebeater punches his wife at 7pm every night On the dot"

"Apparently beer contains female hormones. After you drink enough you can neither drive nor shut the hell up."

"What's red and invisible? No tomatoes"

"Why was Hitler late to his meeting? He did nazi how late it was!"

"I used to be embarrassed by my facial hair, but it grew on me."

"The other day, someone called me an oxymoron. I was raging calm."

"School portraits would be way cooler if they were all mid-spaghetti-bite candids."

"How many blood hungry vampires does it take to dress a wound? The answer's irrelevant as they all suck at it anyway."