143067

Joke of the Day

"Oh white people, is there anything you won't try to fix with a 5K run/walk?"

"There are always two ways to look at things. I prefer to look at them my way."

"What's the difference between outlaws and in-laws ? Outlaws are wanted"

"[lookin in bushes for our baby] me: where the hell can he be? dog: roof roof roof me: will you shut up [baby waves at the dog from the roof]"

"Roses are red, violets are blue. Pornhub is down, your Facebook will do."

"My wife told me she was going to leave me because of my obsession with The Monkees, at first I didn't believe her... ...But then I saw her face."

"What does Harry Potter say after he purchases slaves? I expect to Potter-own 'em."

"Why can't a bicycle stand with out a kick stand? It's just two-tired."

"Those goddamn Asian drivers....... Always crashing my PC"

"Let he who is without sin, get the hell away from me."