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Joke of the Day

"Good thing girls started uploading pictures next to a pool with the caption ""Summer is finally here!"" or we wouldn't have known it's summer."

"I hate being bi-polar It's awesome"

"I was pleased with the first day of The World Cup, and even more pleased that it didn't turn into ""2 Girls, 1 World Cup"" as I had feared."

"How do you know your sister is having her period? When your fathers dick taste like blood."

"Q: What do you get when you cross an Arab with a Mexican? A: Oil of Ole'"

"An old man is running through the halls of an old-folks home wearing a cape and yelling ""Super Sex! Super Sex!"" An old lady pokes her head out of her room and says, ""I'll have the soup."""

"A man called Knock Knock knocks on a door: Knock Knock. Who's there? Knock. Knock who? Knock Knock. Who's there? Knock. Knock who? ..."

"Why don't ants go to church? Because they are insects."

"If you count a little kid on another kid's shoulders under a trench coat as two people, then I have had TWO boyfriends"

"I drink because I care. About me. And drinks."