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Joke of the Day

"TIFU by complimenting a co-worker's womanly hips. Get over it, Steve."

"You, my friend, deserve a high-five...that's four more fingers than I normally give."

"In the past, when you were angry with someone you fought them. Now you just delete them off Facebook. That'll teach 'em to fuck with you."

"What did the dad say when his daughter gave him gravel for his birthday? Thanks for sediments"

"The difference between a rock band and a jazz group The rock band will play 3 chords in front of 1000 people. The jazz group will play 1000 chords in front of 3 people."

"Nothing beats a beautiful girl with a great singing voice! Except Chris Brown"

"I tried fixing my muffler today... ...well, it's exhausting."

"Naps are for old people. I was taking a horizontal life pause."

"What? What do you call a man with one extra finger on his left hand? John Dillinger."

"Funny one liner if the purpose of technology is to make our lives easier, then i need a ""voice-based-auto-adjustable-underwear""."