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Joke of the Day

"How many cops does it take to screw in a lightbulb? None, they'll just arrest the light for being broke and beat the room for being black."

"What do you call a homeless Italian man? Giovanni Change"

"Years later, Kevin McCallister murdered his older brother at a family Christmas party. It was a total buzzkill."

"Did you hear about the cannibal who cloned himself to see what he would taste like? It made him shit himself."

"[HIGHLY OFFENSIVE] TRANSGENDER MORE THAN MEETS THE EYE"

"good parents A mother said to her son, ""Look at that kid over there; he's not misbehaving."" The son replied, ""Maybe he has good parents then!"""

"What did the zero say to the eight? Nice belt."

"I tried my best to prepare my girlfriend for dinner with my folks. Dad loved her, but mum said she could've done with another hour on a low heat."

"Why isn't Sean Connery allowed to play Super Mario Bros. any more? He kept trying to shave the princess."

"When I die... When I die, I hope it is peacefully in my sleep like my grandfather, not screaming in horror like his passengers."