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Joke of the Day

"When I was born I was given two choices: The first was to have a perfect memory, and the other was to have a huge penis. Unfortunately, I can't remember which one I chose."

"Why could the french man not count to four? He could not get past the tree!"

"The time between the nurse leaving the room and the doctor entering is for exploring and trying out as many tools as possible"

"How many Vietnam vets does it take to change a light bulb_ You can't know man, you weren't fucking there."

"Why do penguins never go to England? Because they're afraid of Wales!"

"I'll throw corrosive acid in the face of anyone who casually glaces at my computer screen while passing my cubicle."

"What type of fish needs to be tuned? Tune a fish"

"Milk is also the fastest liquid on earth... Its pasteurized before you even see it!"

"What did Joan Rivers say to God when she arrived? Get a new robe!"

"Computer backup systems are expensive so I include ""Death To America"" in my email signature & the NSA backs up everything I've ever written."