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Joke of the Day

"When Chuck Norris goes to Vegas, he doesn't have to gamble. The casinos just give him stacks of money."

"What lives in the sea and yells? A clam shouter."

"I take my wife everywhere, but she keeps finding her way back."

"Two necrophiliacs are walking down the street when they pass a morgue. The first necrophiliac says to the second ""Want to stop in for a couple of cold ones?"""

"""Pay attention, 007; this might look like an ordinary suitcase but, if you push this button, a handle comes out and you can wheel it."""

"I'm quite confident that the reason i'm single Is because i didn't forward that chain letter in 2008"

"Mom She gave me life She gave me love She gave me sarcasm She gave me the ability to cut brake lines so that it looks like an accident."

"Apparently Kevin Bacon was killed last night. . . And they're charging the shooter with 6th degree murder. . ."

"I'm no Exorcist, but i did scare the hell out of someone once."

"A man walks up to his friend and asks him what he is doing... The man replies: I'm donating this chair to CHAIRity."