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Joke of the Day

"What's the difference between a light bulb and a pregnant woman You can unscrew a lightbulb"

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"My friend cooled himself to absolute zero... he's 0K now."
"How to Get There by Ridya Bike"
"I have this song in my head I haven't heard in years. I'm pretty sure it's called ""Don't Speak""? On second thought, there's no doubt in my mind."
"Active voice: I loved your book Passive voice: Your book was loved Passive-aggressive voice: I love how you felt the need to write a book"
"Driver "" I'm very sorry to learn that your wife ran away with your driver "" said the friend to the old man. "" oh, don't worry, I can drive """
"What's Terrance Howard's favorite Radiohead song? ""(1 x 1 = 2) + 2 = 5"""
"What do black Eskimos live in? A nigloo."
"Why was the young kangaroo thrown out by his mother? For smoking in bed."
"If you can't find the source of a quote, attribute it to Kurt Vonnegut, Einstein, Dorothy Parker, or H. L. Mencken and move on."