209551

Joke of the Day

"""Sorry we're late. We had to stop so I could pee."" ""For two hours?!"" ""Yeah. It came out really slow."""

"Masturbating is wrong in some people's eyes... Also, it burns."

"What are your go to jokes? I was at an event the other day and someone asked ""So... anyone know any jokes?"" What's everyone's ""go to"" joke in social situations?"

"What's the difference between roast beef and pea soup Everyone can roast beef"

"Knock Knock Who's there ! Briony ! Briony who ? Briony beautiful sea !"

"Why was the Queen of Horses hated by her subjects? Because she was too ahoof."

"Why did the cheese maker not enjoy the movie? <in a Dutch accent> Not much Gouda"

"What do you get when you cross Cleopatra with Marc Antony? Pharaoh-moans."

"Did you hear that H.P. Lovecraft wrote a cookbook? It's called the Necronomnomnomicon."

"What do you mean mom, how could my birth certificate be expired?"