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Joke of the Day
"The best part of being a supervillain is the freedom to laugh maniacally at all times"
Next Joke
"in response to u/alexsings, What 6 letter word has a n, i, g, g, e and ends in an r that's used to describe a certain group of people... ...ginger... ...you racist fuck!"
"Two Charles Dickens bar drinks Charles Dickens Martini- olive or twist Charles Dickens Cider- usually a little tart"
"[writing own obituary before going to the zoo just in case] ""his hatred of lions was well known and dreamt of fighting one two of them"""
"Everything's racist these days. You can't even say ""black paint"" anymore. You have to say ""Tyrone, paint that wall""."
"This orange juice says shake well before drinking. *shakes juice and puts back in fridge then opens beer"
"What do a Yugo and a bath have in common? You can't step out of them in public."
"Cops are kinda weird, asking stupid questions. 'Do you know why I pulled you over?' Cause I have weed in the glove compartment?"
"What has got 8 legs and 1 eye? 2 chairs and a half of a fish."
"Mum thinks she's Dad. **Dad:** Honey, where oh where is a pair of my underwear? **Mum:** Your underwear is under there. **Dad:** Under where? **Mum:** Yes."