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Joke of the Day

"I've finally worked out why Spain is so good at football. Nobody expects the Spanish in position."

"Inventor displays the first knife ever. His friend, ""that's the greatest invention since bread"" Inventor, ""well I'm about to blow your mind"""

"While I'm shopping at Costco my kids wait by the exit and try to get adopted by a wealthy family."

"I once had a job circus sizing elephants. The pay was lowsy, but the tips were huge!"

"The British are coming! Get ready! Oh wait they're coming by boat. We have like three months"

"I voted for Giant Meteor for 2016 Guess I'll just hope for another."

"My wife asked what I thought of her new blouse and I used the word ""slimming"", I explain to the other homeless people."

"Why don't pirates like anal? Because they hate having to clean the poop dick."

"Did you guys hear about the new exorcist movie? where the woman hires the devil to pull the priest out of her son."

"chemistry What did the scientist say when he found 2 isotopes of helium? ""HeHe"""