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Joke of the Day

"*Soccer Commentator* 'Adopted Children F.C. are having a great season, they might even make the playoffs this year if they can sort out their weakest position.' 'Nobody wants to be left back!'"

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"My reaction to winning a billion dollars wouldn't even come close to my 5 year old's reaction when I told him that there's no school today."
"I think it's adorable when kids lose their teeth, they look like tiny meth addicts."
"[NSFW] A guy to a girl - Hey, want to stick our fingers in each other's belly-botton ? Girl - Sure, how do W... OH, thats not my belly button. Guy - That's not my finger!"
"Did you hear about the kidnapping? he woke up"
"Wanna hear a joke? Women's rights."
"Question: What do elephants use for tampoons? Answer: Sheep."
"America's national mascot should just be a drunk white girl typing on a shattered iPhone."
"Did the Deer have any doe? he had 2 Bucks"
"Duct Tape Turning ""No no no"" into ""mmm mmm mmm"""