141167

Joke of the Day

"My lucky number is 17 so I'm really hoping that 2017 is finally going to be my year. Otherwise, I'll have to change my lucky number again."

"My ex's taught me that not every I love you is real."

"What do you call a Russian, homophobic, golfer? Vladimir Putting"

"What's a pirate's favorite explosive? M80"

"Why did the necromancer fail to meet his quarterly sales goal? He ran his business on a skeleton crew."

"What did the pope give up for lent? His job."

"Religion because thinking for yourself is hard."

"The moderators of The Joke Cafe rejected the joke I submitted about my penis. ... They said it was too long."

"What's the difference between Cottage Cheese and Cream Cheese? I didn't cottage in my pants"

"""Can I get a do-over?"" - Me, playing golf, tennis (or pretty much any sport), taking a test, having sex, making a speech, living my life...."