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Joke of the Day

"The groom upon his engagement went to his father and said ""I've found a woman just like mother!"" His father replied ""So what do you want from me sympathy?"""

"Need expensive surgery? Tell a surgeon you're auditioning a few before picking one. Have them do the surgery then say ""OK I'll let you know"""

"What do you call the ticket to get into a giant space station shaped like a vagina? A cunt-astro-fee!"

"Password: 1 upper case letter, 1 lower case letter, 1 stair case, 1 briefcase, 1 in case of emergency, 2 cases of beer, and 1 quesadilla."

"What's the definition of an Irish homosexual? One who likes women more than beer"

"You see those cows over there? They are outstanding in their field."

"Did you know someone in London gets stabbed every 52 seconds? I feel bad for the poor fella."

"So which Gate works at the army? Col.Gate I'll leave now."

"(Original) did you know that if you squeeze one of your balls hard enough you'll cum? Because sooner or later you'll bust a nut"

"This rude guy asked my wife if she shaves her asshole..... And she said ""No, my husband shaves himself""."