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Joke of the Day
"You're leaving Twitter? For good? That's too bad. We'll miss you. See you next week!"
Next Joke
"What do you call a snail in the Navy? A Snailor"
"What do you call the surgery when a woman gets a sex change? Addadictomy"
"Google glasses? No thanks, too much tech. It's weird ""You can secretly watch Netflix at work"" Oh, please take literally all of my money."
"A college girl sends a text to her BF who doesn't respond ""Could this night get any worse?"" unaware that an alien fleet approaches earth"
"Two mice were chewing on a film roll ..when one of them says: *I think the book was better*"
"I heard that Yoga class was a great place to meet women So I went every day for three months. Bad news is I didn't meet a girl. Good news is I can now give myself a blowjob."
"A girl said she has seen me in a vegetarian meeting... I told her I have never met herbivore"
"Every kiss begins with K but so does every kidnapping. That's how words work people."
"Sorry I haven't returned your text in 3 days, I was taking a nap."