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Joke of the Day
"[pours a bag of sugar over a tire fire] hmmm [tastes remnants] i think i'll call it... Twizzlers"
Next Joke
"How many blood hungry vampires does it take to dress a wound? The answer's irrelevant as they all suck at it anyway."
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"Hurricane Sandy I asked my bartender for a Hurricane Sandy. She looked confused and asked, ""What is that?"" I replied, ""A watered down Manhattan."""
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"If you keep pronouncing the L in salmon I going to stab you with my kah-nife"
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"WebMD just diagnosed me as fergalicious"