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Joke of the Day

"The adult version of Operation is trying not to break a tortilla chip while dipping it into a jar of salsa."

"I walked into the bar sober with $42 & walked out drunk with $42. But you're right fellas, men are smarter than women."

"What kind of tea did the american colonists want? Liberty"

"What's the difference between a 5 year old kid and a bag of cocaine? Eric Clapton wouldn't let a bag of cocaine fall out the window."

"When's the worst time to eat candy? When she's on her period."

"As soon as my daughter realizes Jamacians, Irish, & wizards don't all have the same accent, I'm probably going to get fired from storytime."

"Why do black guys always have nightmares? Because we killed the only one with a dream."

"I fell off a forty foot ladder today.... lucky I was on the bottom rung."

"A Roman walks into a bar... and holds up two fingers and says ""I'll have five beers please."""

"My best friend's a rocking chair... ...we go way back."