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Joke of the Day
"I wrote a poem about the NFL It has 32 offensive lines."
Next Joke
"5-year-old: I'll stop asking you to take our family to Disneyland Me: You finally understand we can't afford it 5: You should just send me"
"I'm in a band called Duvet. We're a cover band."
"(Rushes to hospital) Dr: Your mother is extremely critical. Me: Don't overreact doctor, she's like that with everyone."
"Lion King is my favourite movie about an innocent baby animal. Being framed for murder."
"Toddlers & Ghosts -haunt you at all hours -lots of moaning/screaming -unclear motives -not helpful with housework -randomly open cupboards"
"Nothing beats the last 30 seconds of a close basketball game. They should just make all games 30 seconds long."
"[PUN]I think I saw a beautiful juniper. Maybe it's fir... or maybe it's maple-ine."
"How does Robin Williams go thrift shopping? Good Will Hunting"
"What is the difference between a pack of pygmies and a girls track team? The pack of pygmies is a bunch of cunning runts."