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Joke of the Day

"Hey, parents of an only child considering having one more, know that I just split an M&M in half. An M&M. In half."

"What do you call an illegal immigrant and a pedophile fighting? Alien Vs Predator"

"My local gadget store has a great deal on devices that measure electric charge, but it's too far to walk. It's a coulomb meter."

"What did the two oceans say to each other Nothing.. They waved."

"Whats the difference between in-laws and outlaws? Outlaws are wanted"

"What did one Fart say to the other? Just so you know, your's is not the only asshole around"

"The pleasure is all mine... The greeting of a greedy hedonist."

"Why does the baker have so many loaves? Because they bred."

"I like to read the Constitution for the articles."

"What does a proud computer call his little son? A microchip off the old block."