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Joke of the Day

"What's blue and not very heavy? Light blue."

"Why does the internet always mourn the death of politicians? Because they are always lion about everything."

"Hey suns wearing sunglasses: that's not going to help, stupid. Think about it."

"Can a hippo be a hypocrite. Would the elephants call him hippocrite. Then he can call them elecunts."

"What do you call a guy dumped by his Asian girlfriend? Disoriented."

"I used to be really scared about marriage... In fact, I hear 50% of all marriages end up lasting Forever!"

"Two really hot women are walking down the street... when a man who suffers from premature ejaculation comes out of nowhere..."

"If you're going to boast non stop about your pregnancy at least give birth to something fun like a puppy, a bouncy castle or a bag of weed."

"Did you hear the joke about the gorilla? Apparently, it's not for kids."

"Hi..You've reached my voicemail. I could come to the phone right now but I saw your name on caller ID so leave a message..or not."