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Joke of the Day

"Hey suns wearing sunglasses: that's not going to help, stupid. Think about it."

"I walked up to my 9yo and said, ""How goes it?"" He looks up at me and says, ""God is history's greatest serial killer."""

"Why did God create black men? So fat white girls could dance (and get laid)."

"How many Northern Californians does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Hella."

"I'm rubber, you're glue. We are both very handy and have a variety of practical uses."

"How do you tell the circumference of a pecan Pecan pi"

"What's the most important part of an ISIS joke? The execution."

"They serve free coffee at my office It's one of the perks."

"why couldn't mrs. claus get pregnant? santa only comes once a year and when he does it's down a chimney..."

"What do you call an emperor who's also a musician? A rock-czar"