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Joke of the Day

"I'd say 20% of my day is spent trying to convince the dog we're not about to be murdered by the UPS guy, mailman, squirrels, ice dispenser.."

"Cation Pronunciation : [kat-ahy-uhn,-on] -Noun Chemistry 1.An ion with paws-tive charge. 2.The cutest ion ever."

"10 ways on how to deal with Click baiting! Does anyone know them?"

"How does a feminist screw in a light bulb? She doesn't, she just holds it in the socket and waits for the world to revolve around her."

"I'm currently on a 2 hour layover in St. Louis airport. I'm cold and Missourable."

"A Woman's place is not in the kitchen Cause that's where all the knives are."

"Pointed out my kids real dad to them at the car wash today. None of us are sure if I'm kidding."

"Yeah, sex is awesome. But have you ever put clothes on straight out of the dryer?"

"Relationship status: My neighbour/girlfriend was kidnapped but she's ok now, I was caught."

"What is the Great Gatsby's favorite superhero? Green Lantern. His least favorite? Deadpool."