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Joke of the Day

"What's faster than a black guy running with a stolen T.V.? His brother with the DVR"

"Why do Butchers don't risk it all in life? Because the Steaks are too high."

"Me: Every beautiful girl has an ugly friend Girl: That's why my friend is ugly Me: I see. You are just a pair of ugly girls"

"The problem with money is too much of it belongs to people who aren't me."

"Why did the skeleton's dick float? because he had a hollow weenie."

"What Obama is doing right now Sitting in the oval office with iPhone headphones on watching Mr. Robot. His advisors knocking on his door. ""GO AWAY!"""

"I have a love-hate relationship with my wife... I love her, she hates me! Ho-ho!"

"I am fresh out of milkshakes, but I'm pretty sure that my willingness to put out on the first date will bring all the boys to the yard."

"SAE used to be jokingly called Somebody Anybody Everybody I guess they wanted to make it clear that wasn't true."

"Heisenberg is driving down the highway and gets pulled over by a cop... Cops says, ""Do you have any idea how fast you were going."" Heisenberg says, ""No, but I know exactly where I am."""