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Joke of the Day

"Build a barricade?! Crap, I thought you said build a bear arcade. Those bears are gonna be pissed when I tell them no more Cruis'n USA."

"Two antennas get married... The ceremony was ok, But the reception was great!"

"I also wrote a poem, too, too I feel. You feel. He feels. She feels. They feel. We feel. I know I'm not a great poet, but I've been told this is very touching."

"Why did Mike Dukakis lose the 1998 Presidential election? He TANKED his campaign!"

"Where did the sick boat go to get a checkup? The Dock!"

"What do people do when a chemist dies? They barium."

"My new girl friend. Just got a new Czech girlfriend, but its taken her nearly 5 days to hoover the house. Turns out she's a Slovak."

"Why doesn't ISIS Like School? Because they always bombed their tests."

"Prior to officially becoming a part of the United States, what was Oregon like? It was very unOregonized."

"I've always sucked at math! How many people should there be in a relationship?"