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Joke of the Day

"Never refer to a woman as a bitch. Instead, refer to her as beautiful. Bitches love being called beautiful."

"The official carriers of India and Pakistan. because of the risk factors: Pakistan International Airlines or PIA is expanded to Please Inform Allah. Air India or AI is expanded to Already Informed."

"""How can I help you? Hi I'd like a root canal ""Are you a patient here?"" No ""Who referred you to us?"" No one ""Ok then why-"" I have a Groupon"

"My white girl power is ability to never putting more than $20 worth of gas in at a time."

"Why can't redditors sew? Because the thread has been locked by a moderator"

"You may think I'm a loser, but to my goldfish I am ""THE GOD OF FLAKES."""

"Tried to pull up my sleeve and accidentally punched myself. It's okay, I've had it coming for some time now."

"Sir, your wife was stabbed ten times, but the missing piece is the murder weapon. So far we have nothing, Mr *checks notes* Scissorhands."

"In 1940 Goebbels made a speech... Proclaiming that the Swastika was an example of the Golden Ratio. Turns out it was a fibbin' Nazi..."

"Why did the hipster burn his tongue? Because he drank herbal tea before it was cool."