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Joke of the Day

"My girlfriend turned to me and said ""Dave, I think we've come to the end of the road."" ""Why?"" I said, shocked. ""We're in a river."""

"What's the Ethiopian national dish? Empty."

"Just read a really great tweet that was 140,000 characters long called a book."

"How can you tell a male dinosaur from a female dinosaur? Ask it a question. If he answers it's a male; if she answers it's female."

"Knock knock -Who's there? -Ala -Ala who? -AKBAR"

"I just finished a 5 year relationship. Luckily it wasn't mine."

"I think I'm more shocked that Rodney King had a swimming pool than that he is dead"

"What did one piano say to another? CBA"

"My mother and father separated last year and my father recently started seeing someone and it's been very hard for me. There are two major issues I have with his new partner. He's black."

"Breaking News : Fulham have signed Brazil forward Fred to replace the Michael Jackson Statue outside of the ground."