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Joke of the Day
"Life is like a penis... Short, hard, and fat. It's the women that make it soft and easy."
Next Joke
"Ozzy Osbourne bites the heads off of bats. Chuck Norris bites the heads off of Siberian Tigers."
"50 ft ladder. John: ""Shit, I just fell off a 50 ft ladder."" Adam: ""Oh no, are you okay?"" John: ""Yeah it's a good thing I fell off the first step."""
"Me: How much for the selfie stick? Him: Sir, that's an Olsen twin. Me: I'll take it."
"*points to refrigerator* That makes things cold *points to stove* That makes things hot *points to self* That makes things awkward"
"What do you call tea made by a stoned marsupial? High koala tea"
"What do you call a Hispanic woman with no legs? Consuelo! My mother told me this one"
"Bro lets study on air plane why air plane For a higher education"
"How much wood... ...could a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck was Chuck Norris? *All of it.*"
"[at therapist] I don't know, sometimes I just feel invisible Therapist: WHO SAID THAT?!?"