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Joke of the Day
"How do attractive men pay for things? They handsome money to the cashier"
Next Joke
"No one is more excited for today than Michael J. Fox... He's been shaking with anticipation for the last 25 years."
"Sorry, ""hella"" was an inappropriate word choice. I was trying to be cool. I'll rephrase: Your son is totally missing."
"Fruit and urinal give a bad name to cakes everywhere."
"[watching lion king] TIMON: hakuna matata ME: *whispering to date* that means no worries TIMON: it means no worries ME: see?"
"What's black, blue and hates sex? A rape victim."
"Two fish are in a tank... Two fish are in a tank when one turns to the other and says, ""do you know how to drive this thing?"
"Snoring comes easily to me. In fact, I can do it in my sleep."
"Why did the baker have so many customers? He desperately kneaded the dough!"
"My gf asked if I liked her more than I like chicken, and all I could say was ""well I have known chicken longer..."""