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Joke of the Day
"Do they make a scale that says things like ""Those shorts probably weigh, what, like 15 pounds?"""
Next Joke
"best Attitude to follow in Life Imagine that you are already dead. This way, whatever u get in life is always a profit for u."
"Sharks aren't the bad guys. If some stranger entered my house in just a Speedo, I would probably attack him too."
"Where does the president keep his armies? in his sleevies!!!"
"""How do you talk to an angel"" Me: I don't know, Skype I guess? ""How do you hold her close to where you are"" Me: Aren't most angels men?"
"Parenting Hack: slide a little cash your kid's teacher's way, & all of his crafts projects will ""mysteriously"" disappear after being graded."
"People say I'm a stand up guy.. ....but I prefer to sit down when I can. Good morning everyone!"
"When does a joke become a dad joke? When it becomes a groan-up."
"What does Dwight Schrute have in common with Greece A bunch of dead beets."
"You know what's fucking shit? A scat fetish"