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Joke of the Day

"Co-Worker: You say apparently a lot. Me: Yes, I know. CW: It really bothers me. M: Apparently so. CW: You don't care. M: Apparently not."

"What looks like a dog sounds like a dog eats like a dog but isn't a dog? A pup."

"An Irishwoman gave birth to triplets and named them Nat,Pat and Tat. However when she tried to breastfeed them she found out there was no tit for Tat."

"LH741: Tower give me a rough time check Tower: It's Thursday Sir."

"I went to the zoo the other day There was only a single animal, it was a dog. It was a shih tzu..."

"My daughter is making a documentary on the invention of the telephone, for a school project. I remember the time I did that, in middle school. Rings A Bell."

"I was arrested at a New Year's party last night I'm sorry, but when you hear an Arab counting down from 10 your fight or flight instincts kick in..."

"The doctor said I had, at best, a year to live... So I shot him. The judge gave me 30."

"Who would win a battle between an orangutan and a hyena? I don't know, but we'll find out November 8, 2016."

"My husband said that he seriously fears for my life every time I go out because I'm the ""kind of person people would want to kill."""