138067

Joke of the Day

"Why do girls wear makeup and perfume? Because they're ugly and they stink."

"My local's rough as anything. I went to the pub quiz the other night-First question was What the f*ck are you looking at?"

"Lars asked Ole, ""Do ya know da difference between a Norvegian and a canoe?"" ""No, I don't,"" said Ole. ""A canoe will sometimes tip,"" explained Lars."

"Did you hear about the outbreak of Urinary Tract Infections at the University of Texas? It's odd they couldn't see the issue with all those UTI's"

"Cannibals are so full of themselves and other people"

"Two Dicks... Two dicks were hanging out at a bar."

"Did you hear about the actress who stabbed her husband at dinner? That blonde girl Reese.... Not Witherspoon, with her knife."

"What kind of phone does a molester have? the iTouch. ( lame but I made it up in class when I was like 15 lmfao)"

"So a Syrian refugee walks into a bar in Hungary. No, he doesn't."

"How do you make a Gorilla laugh? Tell it an elephant joke!"