137782

Joke of the Day

"I believe if Floyd fought Ali ... I believe it would be a close fight but Floyd would win. Because Ali has Parkinson's"

"What's the difference between a pedant and a sadist? A sadist is honest about his intentions. ____________________________________ That probably wasn't funny, but what do I know?"

"All women say they just want to meet someone with a sense of humor - From what I can tell, Rich guys are fucking hilarious-"

"If electricity comes from electrons, does morality come from morons?"

"So a gun expert has a seizure His neurons were firing with BOTH barrels."

"I was recently diagnosed with depression It made me sad"

"I'm going to pay a stranger to cut my head hairs. This is normal and I'm normal for doing it"

"So I was at the club They played crank that, and I did the Superman. They played the Cupid shuffle, so I did the Cupid shuffle. They played Come on Eileen, and I got kicked out of the club."

"When a girl doesn't invite me up to her place after a date I just assume it's because she's a hoarder with 30 kitty cats."

"How can you tell soap operas are fictional? In real life, men aren't affectionate out of bed. "