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Joke of the Day
"Why can't Helen Keller drive a car? Because she's dead."
Next Joke
"What's the difference between a gay man and a Christian man? One fucks an asshole, the other is a fuckin' asshole."
"Why do chicken coops only have two doors? If they had 4 doors they'd be chicken sedans."
"There's just 1 thing u can count on: fingers. And calculators. 2 things. Oh abacuses. Three. Jeez Im gonna need to make a list. Lists. Four."
"[phone rings] ""Is your refrigerator running?"" *looks over at fridge holding a lighter up to a spoon* ""I don't know what he's doing anymore."""
"Why did the mushroom have so many friends? He was a fungi."
"Two back desk orchestral players go fishing And one falls out of the boat. He screams: ""help, I don't know how to swim!"" His partner replies: ""just fake it!"""
"I went to the shops to get eight cans of sprite. But when i was walking back i realized Id only picked 7 up"
"What did they serve for lunch at Jurassic Park? Chilean Sea Bass. Spared no expense. Didn't you watch the movie?"
"What do you say to your laces to make them go away? Shoo laces"