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Joke of the Day

"A friend told me there's a place like twitter called ""outside"" where people favorite each other by making eye contact and smiling. Unfollow."

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"When my swear jar gets full I'm gonna use the money to buy a motherfucking puppy!"
"My grandfather was diagnosed with Alzheimer's and Severe Dandruff... He's been really flaky lately."
"What kinda meat does a priest eat on Friday? nun"
"Q: Why did Bobby Fischer marry a woman from Prague? A: He was looking for a Czech mate."
"I've replaced my neighbors toothpaste with Napalm, and left him a free pack a cigarettes. Now we wait."
"A Briton is on vacation in Germany. The man walks into a bar. Dies."
"What did Santa Claus say when Mrs. Claus asked him for the weather? It's rain, dear!"
"Where can you find the speed of light? At C level"
"Why was Luke Skywalker convicted of rape ? He used the force ."