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Joke of the Day

"Girlfriend: No, you hang up... Me: (click)"

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"When I worked at the shoe store... I was the sole employee."
"I have the body of a god Shame it's Buddha"
"A robber walks into a bakery, and pulls out a gun. ""Give me the dough!"""
"What has bottom on the top? Legs."
"The #1 rule of being a successful shirt: Always Be Clothing."
"What did one tonsil say to the other? Get dressed, the doctor is taking us out tonight!"
"After a whole year my school Extestentialist Club declared me... ...most likely to be"
"Why do Trekkies never grow out of Star Trek? They always somehow just Klingon to it."
"I called out of work today... Told my boss I had anal glaucoma. I couldn't see my ass coming in today."