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Joke of the Day

"{Goes to buy Virgin Airlines ticket} ""Can I buy one even if I've done sex?"" Um. Yes sir ""Cause I have"" Okay ""I've done all of it"" Please go"

"Why isn't soap cool? Because it's basic."

"Did you hear about the librarian who wanted to get arrested? Turns out she just wanted to get booked."

"You know, gas prices really aren't that bad when you consider that you're essentially buying dinosaurs in liquid form."

"What do you call an angry German? A sauerkraut"

"Why did the kid dump a bucket of water off the school roof? He wanted to make a big splash in front of his class."

"What is purple and commutes? An Abelian grape!"

"Girls don't poop. They go to the bathroom to talk shit."

"Be alert! The world needs more lerts"

"What do you call a learned spider? A webdesigner"