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Joke of the Day
"How many eggs did Kelly Clarkson eat for Easter? All of them. (It's timely if not funny, right?)"
Next Joke
"Q: What's red and not there? A: No tomatoes."
"""10 Things I Hate About You"" is my favorite movie that sounds like a bitter Buzzfeed article"
"Zoo Keeper:""I've lost one of my elephants"" Other Zoo Keeper:""Why don't you put an advert in the paper?"" Zoo Keeper:""Don't be silly he can't read!"""
"What is an electrician's favorite vehicle? A Voltswagen"
"Lucy in the Sky with Some Splainin' to Do."
"Guys say ""never trust something that bleeds seven days and doesn't die"" as if something with two heads powered by one brain is trustworthy."
"How rare was the disease that killed Tom Jones' wife? It's not unusual"
"Personally, I don't find swearing offensive. I think it adds character & emphasis to a conversation. I do find, backstabbing, lying, cheating and screwing people over offensive, but not swearing."
"Wife walks up to husband and asks for money Wife: I need some money to buy a bra Husband: do you think you have breasts big enough to buy a bra? Wife: when you bought boxers, did I say anything?"