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Joke of the Day

"Why did the fisherman decide to go fishing? For the halibut."

"'Find a guy who ruins your lipstick, not your mascara ' lol mate ruin any part of my makeup nd ur gettin smacked down"

"Why are cows lazy and fat? Because they don't like to mooooooooooooove."

"Yelp is a fun game where you try to guess between whether a restaurant is bad or a reviewer is crazy."

"A scientist tried to recreate the Chernobyl disaster using only transparent gases It was a new, clear reaction."

"Counted five pregnant women at this Noah matinee. Praying their water doesn't break."

"Sometimes ""I'm single"" means ""I'm drama free"", ""less stressed"" and ""I refuse to settle for less."""

"Hey girl, Did you fall from heaven? Because it looks like you landed on your face."

"A man on an airplane was having a heart attack The stewardess asked if anyone on board was a doctor. A man replies, ""I'm a vegan!"""

"Hello 911? ""What's your emergency?"" You work in a building? ""Yes"" Inside? ""Yes WHAT'S YOUR EM-"" So you're saying 911's an inside job?!"