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Joke of the Day

"If I burn my mouth on ONE MORE FUCKING PIZZA I will probably continue to buy and eat pizza for the rest of my life."

"My favorite German children's story is that one where some unspeakably terrifying thing happens to teach a minor lesson."

"""I'd like a bowl of soup please."" ""Any sides?"" ""I hope so, or it'll go EVERYWHERE."""

"How does a mathematician solve his constipation problem? He works it out with a pencil! = "

"Just walked in on my uncle ""taking a selfie"" :("

"My grandma can't wrestle But you should see her box."

"Found in the comments to the picture of a nice looking girl He: ""Could you please send me one of your pubes for me to clone?"" She: ""You know how to clone people?"" He: ""People?! God no! Just pubes."""

"The Department of Unfinished Statistics concluded... ... that 7 out of 10."

"How many feminists does it take to change a light bulb? The fact that you think that it's not society, but the light bulb that should change is problematic."

"Did you hear about the new German microwave? It seats 8."